I married on April 12, 2014, for the first time, at the age of 46. This is also my husband’s first marriage, and we both were beginning to wonder if it was ever going to happen for us. It wasn’t my choice to be single for that long. Each passing year watching my girlfriends find “Mr. Right,” get married and start families, just seemed to make the ache of loneliness grow even deeper. I couldn’t understand why I had such a deep desire for marriage if God was never going to fulfill it. I learned a lot in those years. A lot about God’s faithfulness, my strength, His character, and my faith. Honestly, I could have married a couple of times. I was engaged in my early 20’s and made the very difficult decision to break off the engagement. I knew it wasn’t a solid relationship and doubtful that it would stand the test of time. Most of my friends and family didn’t understand my decision, but I knew God was telling me “no.” It was a very lonely time for me. After that relationship, I dated several other wonderful guys over the years. Guys who would make great husbands. But in time, we or I realized they just weren’t going to be the “right” husbands for me. Most people did not understand. I was called “picky”......A LOT! Haha!
After the death of our spouses, God brought Tom and me together. We shared the most beautiful, God-filled marriage you could ever imagine. My heart is totally broken over his passing but I know that our love will live on in my heart forever. God was the master designer of our relationship and precious love for each other. I am so thankful that God loved us both so much. That's what made our life together so abundantly happy. Without a close relationship with our Lord and Savior, you will never experience the pure joy of love with your spouse. The deeper the grief, the closer The Lord. He holds my hand everyday.
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I know this is something that we have all shared about before but I have really been pondering this lately. Dickie Jones, our Sunday school teacher, has taught a few lessons on this topic for the last couple of weeks and it got me to thinking. I do think we should share our stories with each other, sometimes our failures are much easier to share because who wants to sound “braggy” with our successes? As a body of believers, we should be there to build up each other in failures and also celebrate our victories. How will we know what’s going on if we don’t “post it”, “pin it”, or “pass it on”? It’s all about making connections just as Jesus did when He shared His stories and parables. So, if we are to be like Jesus… it’s all about our relationships and making connections with other people. The Lord has blessed each of us with a story to tell; He gives us all different experiences to share. Then when we go out, like the disciples, we try to make our connections. We glean something from each story that is shared and then we pass that on to someone else. All of this to build our Christ community and to be His hands, feet, and voice to everyone we meet.
“All your children shall be taught by the Lord, and great peace shall be the peace of your children”. – Isaiah 54:13
Last Sunday was Father’s Day and as on very rare occasions these days; all of our grown children were home at once! Moms and Dads of married and college aged children, can you FEEL what I mean by that? Contentment, happiness, joy, and even anxiousness to breathe in every word and moment filled our precious time!
One of the things we love to do as a family is to sit under the shade of an old river birch tree planted when they were little and either fish or just talk. We reminisce about fun times jumping off the paddle boat with friends, church parties when everyone ended up wet, and of course, the time when my daughter was very young and went ballistic because her Daddy threw back the fish she wanted to eat! So many fun times on that old pond!
Now the dog and cat bring us our amusement as Greg and I sit under the river birch tree. The deer eating our garden and the state of our lawn health fuel our conversations. At times it seems strange and kinda sad to not have those three Kight goof balls doing unsafe bicycle flips off a homemade ramp into the water or running toward a slippy slide headed down the hill, but at other times it’s ok just to remember…
God gave us children for a reason … to raise and enjoy for a season. Ultimately though they are His. We, as parents, are expected to raise them to be independent and go out into the world as adults who love the Lord and are striving to serve Him above all else. I’m not saying we did a perfect job, we would be the first to admit our shortcomings in the parenting realm, but we did always try to keep our focus on the end result … the place we are right now … the place of letting go and handing them back over to their Heavenly Father.
We will soon be seeing a whole new generation of Kight children as our son and daughter-in-law bring our first grandchild into the world in December (move over grandanimals … sorry). One thing I know for sure, Brendan and Lauren will be fantastic parents … not because of us or Lauren’s parents, but because the Lord has them by the hand. This is our goal, moms and dads, not to make our children the “most popular” in school, not to have them be a star athlete, and not to have them be the valedictorian (although these are all worthy accomplishments) but to have them walking with the Lord as we let go of their hand to place it in hand of God.
I look forward to this grandchild and hopefully many more to come. It’s a new generation and a new God given opportunity to start anew and laugh under the shade of the old river birch tree…
Valentine’s Day is here again.
A time for love, hugs, kisses and CHOCOLATE!
I am once again reminded of the precious gift the Lord has blessed me with my husband. I just love reminiscing about our courting days. He was THE ONE, my Prince Charming! Who but a Prince would take his true love, on their first date, deer shining? We would also take long romantic drives through the countryside, mud slinging in his huge black truck with tires taller than me. On special nights we would sometimes drive through the drive- in and get a coke with ice and a straw. Good Times, Good Times!! I was truly smitten and in love. Imagine my surprise when looking back on these fond memories with the Love of my life and finding out that what I had seen as innovative, and romantic outings; my husband recalled them as being cheap dates thought we really loved spending time together: he was thinking, we can’t really afford to go anywhere.
Over the next 26 years we have, on occasion, seen a few other things from differing points of view. But, we have also learned that seeing eye to eye on everything is really very boring. In 1st Corinthians 13 the love chapter God says love is patient and kind, it is not self-seeking, nor easily angered. Love keeps no record of wrongs (I have trouble with that), Love always protects, always trusts, always hopes and always endures, even after 26 years! What a beautiful picture of His love the Lord has given me in my spouse. Not a Fairy Tale feely kind of love but a deep down committed, always kind of love.
Sooo, in keeping with the Valentine’s Day tradition, give your special someone a sweet treat. In a clear gift bag place a plastic wine or champagne glass (dollar tree, my early dates taught me to be thrifty). Inside the glass put several chocolate kisses (jewelry or gift cards fit nicely, along with chocolate of course). Next, place a cutie for your cutie (tangerine), tie with pretty ribbon and add a bottle of your favorite Sparkling Grape Juice! Save a plastic glass for yourself and enjoy a romantic and thrifty date night!!
1 Corinthians 13:13 "Love never fails"
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